Or we might plan to celebrate our birthday up until the point we have certain expectations of the day and maybe not feel disappointed in the end but more uncertain than ever over life. There is a fine line between the two.
Your visit is always appreciated, Nihar. They are always worth the wait because when the time is right, we have such good chats. Indeed Mabel, with so much cacophony around us and so much of work at hand we are literally lost in the wilderness of disguised work. And we have became mechanically busy creatures and we are aping machines and we have managed to successfully do so, and have come close to behaving like machines and the classic irony is that machines have started imitating like human beings, and the role reversible is such an intriguing subject.
It so happens that we are forced into organising or joining a party on such occasions and at times it becomes asphyxiating and we desperately want the party to end and we want to come out and enjoy the true reflection with self, the quite moment and also being with very few close friends and spending a meaningful conversation…has much more to offer than the dance, music and the food in the party.
I agree in the digital age wishes are programmed in a sense it is machine made and we have moved away from nature and natural aspects of life are rarity and we are sucked into the virtual world run by machines programmed and unfortunately we take it for real and add so much of our emotions and feelings whereas from the other side it as automatic machine message, notifications are deceptively smart to churn our emotions and the person behind is no where there to be seen and we feel for him or her which has no bearing.
Always a pleasure Mabel to exchange such lovely conversations, I agree it has become far in between and I need to get back to my regularity in this space and being in the place we enjoy so much. Disguised work and disguised emotions are something that will inevitably hurt us all in the end. Machines can be useful to streamline tasks and make life easier.
As humans, we have emotions and that in itself is so unpredictable. The last thing many of us want is to be treated as a person to talk to because they are there for company and nothing more. So true that reflection of self can have so much more to offer than a loud party.
For extroverts, maybe they do prefer a party. Sure, there will be food at a party but we can always bring our snacks to our own small and quiet get-togethers. Not everyone has the time to catch up with each other face-to-face, or have a meaningful long conversation online. But these moments are always worth the effort and wait. Yes Mabel it is these emotions and the feelings that makes us who we are and makes us as human beings different from the animal species and today machines are jostling for that space with man.
In everything we do in life from thinking, working, our performance or productivity, our passion and profession, all these depends so much on how we manage and control our emotions.
A small trigger is enough to spiral our emotions out of control and we lose vital time in resolving in the whirlwind of concocted emotions. And emotions are quite personal and we need to have it and we need to nurture those feelings to build our personality where only rationality and rational thinking becomes quite bland without the blend of such nuggets of emotions.
Same here Mabel always always enjoy sharing such deep thoughts and profound discussion with you. Have a great weekend. In fact, I feel the same way about the Christmas holidays. I came from a family of 5. A birthday among so many was always a way to feel special.
Great post … I enjoyed reading your prospective. OOOppppssss … forgot — those desserts are luscious looking. You photographed them perfectly. Those sweet treats tasted amazing. Aaaahhh … loook at you — a little baker too. You are great at so many things. Happy baking …. Thanks for the well-wishes, Isadora. There certainly is quite a bit of pressure when it comes to organising a celebratory occasion, especially when you are the only one organising it — can be quite a lot of juggling from getting the food to inviting the guests.
Lovely to hear you enjoy your birthday when you were younger.. Have a wonderful weekend, Mabel. As a child, I adored all the birthday cards and presents I got from family and friends, and as the years have gone by those have decreased. The year that my mother died, I just wanted everyone to forget my birthday.
It is nice that you still receive some cards each year, and you must be important to quite a few people around you. Oh yes, big time, Mabel. Ah, eating jelly and ice-cream as a kid for your birthday. It sounded like a treat back then.
I also had memories of eating jelly during my birthday when I was a kid — blue jelly that my mother made. Sounds like Christmas time is a great cover for your birthday. My favourite was always orange jelly.
Yes, I have the perfect cover for my birthday. Actually I never thought about blue jelly being blueberry flavoured. Now that you mention it, I think so since I remember it tasting sweet and tangy, and like a blueberry.
My mum always served it cold. Never enough cake, Hugh. You could have one slice and the next thing you know you could actually have the whole cake. It is so interesting reading your post and the many, many comments, Mabel. It seems that I have a lot of company in feeling self-conscious around birthday celebrations. They sometimes seem to me that others ring or wish you a Happy birthday out of so kind of duty, or social convention, and they are not always sincere.
So, like many others, the way I celebrate birthdays is with one or two friends and in that way, I have a reason to have a social engagement once a week for many weeks. For me, it is a way to catch up with people I might not otherwise get to see. The birthday is not the focus, it is only the reason to initiate the meeting.
My children do NOT like a fuss on their birthday, one of them from as early as 2 years old, instructed me that the family was NOT to sing Happy Birthday — he has social anxiety!! I genuinely want to make a fuss for them and make their day super special, however, I have learnt to respect that they can spend it anyway they want, even NOT to acknowledge it at all, and in this way, I also get my wish to make them feel happy on their special day.
You summed up how I feel about birthdays, Amanda. But I do agree on you how a birthday or having a social convention a week is to meet people and catch up with them — that is maintaining connections. Life is always more interesting with others around, even for us who are introverts or with anxiety. Your children sound like they know what they want, lol. It is nice of you to want to make them feel special on their special day and do so in your way that makes them comfortable — and I guess at the end of the day they appreciate it.
Time, effort and presence can mean so much to someone, especially if they are not expecting it but done right, if you know what I mean. Thank you so much for reading the comments, Amanda. Yes I know what you mean by done right. You are always so kind, and accepting in your comments, Mabel. It is a pleasure for me when you comment andI learn not to be judgemental.
Thank you, Vishnu. Your pancakes look amazing. Great post! If you have time, go check out my travel blog! No reason we need to celebrate our birthdays lol. It is up to us. Hi Mabel, I obviously missed this post at the time it was published. I am one of the fortunate ones who has the opportunity of living longer and getting older each year. Happy Birthday, Norah! Thank you for wanting to read my eating habits post so soon. I was scheduling it for Thursday but accidentally published it late last night.
Thank you, Mabel. I did have a lovely day celebrating with my family. They make me feel very special. My son cooked me a delicious meal and I had fun with my grandchildren. My daughter Skyped from Hobart so it was all rather lovely. I look forward to your post when it goes up on Thursday. Your family is so nice to you. I have an absolutely wonderful family. They bring me much joy.
I appreciate your birthday wishes, and look forward to many more celebrations. I like you too. I never celebrate birthday with other before I get married, but I do go out to the restaurant and eat out without remembering how old I am: I buy something nice for myself and just enjoy the day. Unfortunately my husband family and himself are very strict on this and insist to have birthday celebration every year, which I found pretty annoying to be honest. Birthday come and go every year and what is the purpose to be remind of how old the person is.
I personally prefer to celebrate alone and just enjoy the day and get something nice for myself:. It is nice to give yourself a treat if you want to on your birthday, and remind yourself how important you are. Your husband and family are very nice to want to celebrate your birthday, insisting on it. Can I just say I love what you write!! This post is me in a nutshell! I may have to do a similar post when my birthday rolls around just so people understand. I start getting anxiety when my birthday is approaching.
My friends want to make plans, presents, and the singing at the restaurant is probably the worst for me. Over time though my very close friends totally understand. They will just text me and during the week will just meet up for breakfast or some low key hanging out. Not necessarily for my birthday — if that makes sense.
Thanks for your nice words, Nadia. Very kind of you. It sounds like we are so similar. The attention on birthdays can be so overwhelming. Even when you keep it quiet, some around you will casually mention it lol. On my birthday the most I will do is have a nice meal out or takeaway. No fuss. Having said that I was at a hotel in HK for a conference and on my birthday they left a cake in my room.
I thought it was a nice touch from the hotel. I guess I much rather make a fuss over others than myself because I like surprising others in a good way.
That is generous of the hotel. I just wrote an article on birthdays and was reading other ones out there as well when I came upon yours. Thanks, Drew.
Yeah, we do have opposite takes on birthdays but can agree on being gracious and really spending the day how we want. Nothing like having people around you who have got your back, and feeling appreciated and showing appreciation to them.
Thanks for stopping by. Friends came from Manchester, Bristol, Brighton, Colchester and beyond. My besties decorated the room, baked my favourite cake, created a playlist which only I could appreciate and made me laugh so hard I had to go to the loo in a hurry.
Even though I had to close my eyes while paying the bill, I felt so lucky to have them. But, hey. Needs must. I had also booked in for a weekend at the Four Seasons in Hampshire with my family.
It was unreal: the spa! The water park! The best cheesecake known to womankind! But wait. My ridiculously generous in-laws gave me a Montenegro guide book, though it is unclear whether they wanted me to come back after yet another birthday minibreak. In fact, my friend who gave birth to twins the weekend before my birthday so inconvenient has booked us dinner at Sushisamba too, eking the celebrations out a little further. Please have a great big, all-singing, all-dancing happy birthday for yourself too: you deserve it.
No problem whatsoever. To be honest, it makes me feel incredibly uncomfortable. I firmly believe that the date on your birth certificate only has a meaning if you allow it to.
I refuse to have anything to do with my biological age! So it marks days or in leap years since your last birthday — so what? In fact, it can actually be quite depressing realising that another year has gone by! Ask yourself this question: are you really that keen on celebrating your birthday? Or do you just do so because your family, spouse or friends expect you to?
Do you find that.
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